My Pat

Ya'll know I'm a geek. I have been for quite some time. Everything from gaming to books. My favorite books include:

• Enders Game
• The Belgariad series by David and Leigh Eddings
• and of course anything by Clive Staples (C.S.) Lewis including Screwtape Letters

Gaming...well, from Realm and Modus Operandi, an old Simutronics game, to the current classics of Ultima Online. Eve, Planetside, the now defunct Earth and Beyond, EverQuest (EQ), EQ2, Star Wars: Galaxies, Dark Age of Camelot, Guild Wars, and World of Warcraft are just MMORPG's that I've tried. After UO came out, I stopped playing first person games, except for a few stints with Roller Coaster Tycoon, and The Sims, I've stuck to Massively Multiplayers.

As you can see, I've spent some good money in gaming. From upgrading my computers each time a new game came out, to software and monthly fees, and of course, keeping high speed instead of the outdated dial up. (YECH!)

Is it any wonder I'd end up marrying another geek? Pat and I share a love for games, and gaming that is a wonderful thing to share between us. We have different playstyles, different guild needs, and such different characters, but we're both drawn to the worlds where we can play together, and interact with idiots and friends alike!

I do not regret my experiences online. I know I had some bad ones. I made some mistakes. But you know, like everything in life, you must learn from your mistakes, instead of fearing them. Fearing them only means you think you'll make them again, and that's not much learning. There's more things in life that I regret.

Being told to get out of the house when I was 16 because I cut my hair. That's kinda a biggie. But you know, I learned from that too, and I don't regret it, it's just another lesson in life. Not that we shouldn't be careful to avoid making mistakes. But being afraid to make them....that implies that fear rules what we do. I'm fearful of a lot of things. I figured this out on my walk last night.

I am afraid of looking like a fool. I am afraid that Pat will be disappointed in me. I am afraid that when I look back at my life there will be so much that I wanted to do and never accomplished. I am afraid that my mouth will get me in trouble at work (healthy fear there, btw). I don't fear being alone though, or silence, or not knowing what to do. I used to.

And then I met Pat. Let me tell you about Pat. He has the kindest heart, though he tries hard to hide it sometimes. He is amazing. He's a good cook. I guess he learned it from his mom. Baking and desserts and so yummy!! And he can look at a recipe and change it to our tastes just by thinking about how he wants it to turn out. Whereas I need to follow a recipe perfectly to make something edible.

He is generous with his money, and looks out for his friends. He thinks of us, and makes his decisions for us based on what is best for us. He is not selfish in the things that matter (does who gets the last bit of leftovers really matter??). When Pat and I met, I was a mess. Stress was a part of who I was. Being sick had crushed my soul and my spirit. Pat saw through that and helped me to find who I was again. Money issues depressed me so that I couldn't function, medication and the length of time I'd been sick crushed the air from my lungs so that even taking a breath of fresh air was a trial.

I love Pat so much. And more then love him. I respect him, and I love doing things that make him happy. His cute little smile is all I want to see by the time I get home from work. His arms around me while we watch tv and discuss the weirdo's on Wife Swap, or a friendly yelling at the tv while a ref makes a bad call against a team playing USC, it's all I ever dreamed of.

We're perfect for each other. My sense of fair play and his competitive spirit. His quick mind and my fierce need for some sort of plan. We fit so well. We're both talkative and playful. We both love to gamble and drink, game and watch football and basketball. Now if only I could impart to him my love for books. I guess the next book of the Sword of Truth series will have to do.

Our love for music is so very different though. Pat listens to God AWEFUL stuff. The Vandals, Unwritten Law, The Clash, White Stripes and Tenacious D. At least we can agree to listen to the new Offspring, The Ramones, almost all country, Nirvana and Green Day. I'm more into Fusion, and Enya, and Frank Sinatra, Disturbed, Groove Armada and Papa Roach (HEY! I have varied intersts in music! It's healthy!!). I care about the lyrics, and what they're trying to say. Pat.... Well I'm not sure what he's going for. But we both try to at least tolerate each others music!!

I'm not sure where I'm going with all of this. I took a long walk yesterday, and while I thought a lot about what I was afraid of, and what was holding me back from what I wanted, I thought about why I was so happy. So I had to share with all of you my love for my perfect Pat. No, he's not perfect. But I'm willing to overlook the imperfect in him for the ways in which we fit so wonderfully.

I've never loved anyone enough to overlook the little annoying things they do that make me want to scream. Except Pat. He makes me want to laugh, and cry with joy, and bear my little heart to him. All because I know that he holds my thoughts and words and the committment that we've made for each other above everything else he may hold dear.

My Saturday!

Well, it's my friday! I have two whole days off, and I am so excited!!!

This weekend is what we at Wal-Mart call Blitz, and what apparently, much of the retail world calls "Black Friday". In one day, our store does about 4 times the business we normally do. Seriously. It's crazy. We had a ton of psycho people lined up outside when we opened on 5am, and when I went home at 11pm our store was so thrashed it wasn't funny.

The pinched nerve in my back has, for the most part, gone away. When bending, or sitting a certain way I can feel it tighten down to my knee, but normally, my movement is not impeded at all!

I've had a hard time getting into this Christmas. Normally, I'm all about the wonderful season of light, love and joyful giving. This year, I just want the stupid thing to hurry up and leave so work won't be quite so insane. I am so looking forward to our trip to Laughlin. A chance to get out of town, enjoy each others company with no stress from our work, see one of my bestest friends whom I miss very much, and just celebrate! YAY! 'til then, it will be hard to buckle down and do the every day stuff. While it has gotten easier in my department, during my support shifts it seems as if the associates in my store seem to demand perfection from others while settling for mediocrity from themselves. I need to carry around a stick of whining and start slapping people with it. I like that idea. I'll have to flesh it out a bit, but it might be workable! *laughs maniacally*

I walked 4 miles today, in 65 minutes. Creating not only great soreness in my back where I was previously hurt, but also in my poor little feetsies! Yes, that's a word. Promise! :p I'm proud of myself! Now I just need to keep it up! WOO!

Off to spend time cuddling with Pat while watching TV! Enjoy everyone!

It's Christmas Time!

Well....Happy Thanksgiving all!

Today starts what many consider to be the Christmas holiday period. The Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade was a lot of fun, and I enjoyed getting up and watching it. Poor Pat was dragged up a good 2 hours before he normally gets up, but he seemed to at least fake enjoying the parade. Can't have everything! :p

We had our friend Jeremy over to spend Thanksgiving with us. Everything turned out very, very yummalicious!! Pumpkin pie used to be a family institution around this time of year. With Nathan's birthday on Nov 17th and Thanksgiving just a few days away, we had pumpkin pie in the house for both events! So I made my own on Wed night. It was very yummy.

I don't have to be at work today until 2pm. I'm very excited!!!! My first blitz where I don't need to be awake at 4am has me very thankful!

We've gone off our low carb diet, because there were lots of things not working. First and foremost was the fact I was using it as a crutch not to exercise. So we're watching calories and I've been really good about walking on our elliptical machine and writing down everything I eat on Fitday. Keeping track helps me see when I can splurge, and when I need to really just suck it up and not have anything more to eat! We've also decided not to eat anything after I get home from work, which kinda sucks. Sometimes I'm starving and feel like I could inhale a whole cow. But I'll just pour myself some hot tea, or some water, and stay away!!

My bankruptcy hearing is set for December 6th! I'm kinda nervous, but I thing everything will go well. Pat and I will drive to Bakersfield togther, make the appearance, and maybe pop into a yummy place to eat!! MMMMMM eat!

Anyway, I got a MP3 player! Finally!! Here it is!! I like RCA's, and the sound quality is impressive, even at the higher volumes. Of course, I can't stand ear buds, so I look retarded with a teeny tiny player and big old huge headphones. Oh well! heheheh For $40 bucks you really can't go wrong, and it's upgradable with a SD or MMC card, so I think it was a great deal!

Off to get ready for work! Hope everyone has a great weekend!!!

The Pain! The Pain!

Let me begin by saying : HAPPY BIRTHDAY NATHAN!!

That's right, my little bro's birthday is today. YAY!

And now, back to our regularly scheduled blog update.


Well guys let me tell you, sciatic issues suck!! Between the cough I started to get and my throat hurting, my back, hip, leg, knee, and foot is caught up in excuciating pain, it's been a miserable few days. Sleeping is the worst. Poor Pat, I've kept him awake tossing and turning. I have a dr's appointment tomorrow, but I know he's gonna send me to a chiropractor, and my insurance doesn't cover it. Heck, my insurance only covers 80% of my dr's visit, with no co-pay. So I guess it's time for the Motrin again. Which sucks, cause I am so tired of taking medications!!!

So I went to the doctor yesterday (Wed) and got a muscle relaxant and motrin. The pain hasn't really gone away, it's just dulled. Went back to work for about 6 hours last night, and am not looking forward to today, much less this weekend. I am seriously considering asking for a transfer out of the electronics department. The drama is just to much. I used to laugh at people who said they quit because of the "b.s." But I'm rapidly approaching that point. I would have quit, long ago!! If it wasn't for Pat, and the disappointment I know he'd feel if I crumbled and let others get the best of me. But it's so hard, and depressing, and horrible going to work knowing I can't say anything to anyone because people are watching me for the slightest of mistkes. Bastiges, all of you!!!

So the 4 year old boy that died back in June while riding Mission Space at Epcot Center died of a heart condition. You can read The Seattle Times' view on it, if you wish. While it's so sad, it's also not something Disney can do anything about, so back off people! A kid is dead, do we really need to blame someone? Grow up.

It would appear most of my co-workers in electronics have signed up with a blogging service called My Space. The funny part is, only one of them has actually entered a blog! The rest have...well home pages, with info about them, but no blog! To "MyFault" may I just say, your ramblings touched my heart, and my thoughts are with you!!! *hugs*

Not a whole lot going on otherwise. Need to get started on the Christmas cards. I have presents to send to both my family and Pat's. I have 2 guides I'm in the middle of writing for DAoC Stratics, and am applying for whatever job I can get out here!!

I'm ready to stop being in pain, get out of town and focus on me and Pat, instead of on everyone else. But apparently, that's not gonna happen 'til January! Come onnnnnnn January!!!!!!!

Everyone have a great week! I'm gonna go take some more motrin and make some breakfast, at 12:30...ha ha ha!

Our New TV Says "No More Trips For A While!"

Well, we got out TV!!! YAY! It's monstrous, and now my whole front room looks dwarfed by it. Guess I need new furniture! HA HA HA

I've written my first in-game guide with Pat's help! Vimli, Dimli...get it? I think it's cute!! It went really well, but editing all those pictures sure takes a long time! My bard made level 44 last night, and is 2 days from a free level! WOO!

Pat and I have been enjoying noodleless lasagna recently! It's very yummy, and totally low carb! (If I want to hear your opinion on my liver exploding due to a low carb diet, I'll ask, thanks!)

1 lb ground beef (we use 10% sirloin)

1 cup marinara sauce - We use one with like 7 carbs 3 sugars from Albertsons

8 ounces mushrooms - sliced

1 cup ricotta cheese

1 egg -- beaten

1 1/2 cups shredded mozzarella cheese -- mixed use (Ok, we kinda up this to 2 cups or so)

1 1/2 tsp Italian seasoning

Nonstick cooking spray

20 pepperoni slices

Preheat the oven to 350°F-180°C.

Brown the ground beef in a frying pan; drain off the
oil.

Add the spaghetti sauce and mushrooms, and simmer 10
minutes.

In a small bowl, mix the ricotta, egg, 1/2 cup
mozzarella (we do a little more), and Italian seasoning.

Beat well with a fork.

Grease an 8-by-8-inch glass baking dish with nonstick
cooking spray.

Spread the beef mixture in the bottom of the dish.

Spread the ricotta mixture on top of the beef mixture.

Lay half the pepperoni slices on top of the ricotta
mixture.

Put remaining 1 cup (or more HA HA) of the shredded mozzarella over
the pepperoni slices, and lay the remaining pepperoni
on top of the cheese.

Bake until bubbly about 20 minutes.

It's yummy! And makes for good leftovers, which Pat is apparently afraid of, for the most part.

There's 46 days left til Christmas! And even less til the opening of The Lion, The Witch, and The Wardrobe! YAY! I've informed work I'll be late on that Friday, since I have to see it opening day!!! WOO!

Pat and I are going to Laughlin for his birthday in January! We've agreed to only spend $50 dollars on each other, since between the new TV, our dental work, the new bike, auto insurance and our homeowners insurance, our savings account needs some time to recover! So we'll get a cheap room, play some cheap blackjack, and take Steven along with us for some much needed after Christmas relaxation and Birthday fun!! WOO!

I am really upset over not being able to find another job. My application isn't even being forwarded to base personel, because there are to many applicants, and I don't have a degree, or any recent experience. It sucks. Badly. When I was a department manager I made 50 cents more and got nights and weekends off. Now I make 50 cents more to be support, work every weekend (except one a month, because Terry ROCKS), work every night, and spend the 2 days I'm not support running around the store because other people don't know how to do things they're getting paid to know! *pulls out her hair* Oh well. Today I go back to work. Joy.

This is one of the deer that we saw when we went camping back on August! Isn't it cool!?? Just thought I'd share! Oki, gonna go make Pat leftovers! Whee!

Movies, Movies, Movies! UGH!

Well, there's a lot going on this week, so I thought I'd catch ya'll up!! Today at work, they're handing out paychecks, along with our regular once a year 20% off one item only coupons! Pat and I have decided to use it on our new TV! I'm so excited!!!

The movie Jarhead opens Friday, and while I'm not a big movie buff, I do want to see it! Having known quite a few marine's while in San Diego, not to mention having dated one, they kinda get under your skin and it's hard to not feel for the sacrifices they give for our country! Should be a good movie. Looking forward to something without all the gore and grossness. A little is fine, but I don't want a Braveheart rendition. UGH!

The new Harry Potter movie comes out on November 18th, the day after Nathan's birthday. Tawnia and I want to go see Prime! And of course, my personal fave, The Lion, The Witch, and The Wardrobe comes out on December 9th. I'll definitely be hitting the first showing. Might be late for work, but oh well!!! I haven't gone to the movies much in forever! Since living in Boise I've seen only a few....Finding Nemo, Star Wars 3, Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory (YUCK), and I think that's it. So this will be a HUGE movie going few months for me!

I found this really cool USA Tourist site, that I think is really awesome!!! Definitely will help in planning our next trip! WOO!

Anyway, gotta go get some stuff done before I go to work! Everyone have a great day!!!

HAPPY NOVEMBER and Merry Thanksgivoween!

Well, I'm back from Disneyland, Halloween has been survived, and now, we get ready for Christmas!

Happy November Everyone!!
Today begins the Christmas season, and the start of another year that begins in good faith, and with joy and love in our hearts!

    This year, Pat and I will celebrate the first year in our house on Thanksgiving! It is an amazing achievement and one I am most proud of! Along with paying off his car, that is! I'm excited, as always, for the start of this season. I've always tried to look for the best in everything and everyone, though amazingly, I'm a pretty pessimistic person! LOL! This time of year makes it nice to be looking for the best in everthing, as people make a bigger effort. Working retail during this season does suck though, and so far, haven't gotten many calls for interviews! *sighs softly*

    The China Lake Navy Base has been doing some weapons testing the last few days. There's nothing like feeling your house shake for 30 seconds, hearing a HUGE boom from a few miles away, and listening to your windows shake for forever, while trying to finish your James Huston book!!! Yesterday's testing was a little scarier then today's, but either way, poor Puppita thinks every time he walks to a certain spot in the yard the sky is going to fall. It's sad, and yet really funny at the same time! Yes, I'm mean. I can't help it.

    So of course, everyone is not surprised that I'm planning another trip! YAY! Disneyland will continue it's 50th anniversary celebration until September of next year, and while I really wanted to take Pat to experience the park, I really think he'd be bored, whereas I can go every day for forever and be happy as a little lamb. Screw being happy as a clam. Stupid Clams!! I missed Pat on my Disneyland trip, even though I knew he'd hate my approach to the park, but we talked it over, because it turns out, he did want to come, he just didn't know it, til I left and had fun without him! So our new trip? Well, I would love to go out of the country, but you know, there are so many great places IN our wonderful country I've never been to, and I thought it would be fun to go to a foreign countries "Visit the U.S." type stuff, and see where people go to visit!!! So we're doing one of the following!

• New York City


• Atlanta


• Boston


• Chicago


• Honolulu


• Las Vegas


• Miami


• Orlando


• San Francisco


• Seattle


• Washington, D.C.

We probably won't do Vegas, since we'll end up drinking and gambling, and we do that all the time. I think it would be fun to do L.A. though! And it's not listed! There's:

• Grauman's Chinese Theatre
• Universal Studios
• The La Brea Tar Pits
• The Walk of Fame
• Whiskey a go-go (Never heard of it, but all the LA guides say you gotta see it, so whatevah!)
• The Wax Museum!
• And my personal fave: The El Capitan Theatre! GO DISNEY MOVIES!

Of course, there are also lots of crazies to be seen, which is an AWESOME way to spend a trip! Hollywood and Vine is probably the biggest home of the crazies outside of New York city! We'll probably end up doing L.A., and then most likely something in Utah, since I've never seen the Canyons of Bryce or Zion. Maybe the Grand Canyon! Of course, if it was up to me, I'd go to San Diego, not tell ANYONE we're there, and just sit at the tidepools at sunrise with some yummy hot coffee, close our eyes and just listen to the ocean, while feeling the heat of the sun as it covers you slowly. Pat would last 5 minutes, then be bored out of his mind though, and I'd probably slap him if he interrupted my focus, so we're prolly not gonna do that! I am excited about doing cool things though. Even if we didn't do anything "corporate" like amusement parks, or stuff like that, we'd still spend money. Even our two day camping trip, just for reserving the spot and the 2 night payment was like 35 bucks! 35 bucks, for laying there on the ground.....yeah. Fun!

    Anyway! My 4 days off ends today, and while the laundry is almost done, the dishes are mostly done, except for last night's dinner dishes, and Pat's bathroom is so clean I invite you to eat off the floor. So today's plan is the rest of laundry, my bathroom, the kitchen, general picking up, and then making Pat vacuum tonight. Of course, Pat needs to get a level tonight in Camelot, and hopefully Steven will be home to help. HE'D BETTER HAVE PICS OF MY GIRLS BTW!!!!!!

    As you can see my bard character has been getting a lot of playtime, and Pat bought his house last night, my house will most likely be bought tonight. The PatBeeSteven land will be official sometime soon! YAY!

What's on this weeks download list?

• Sister Sledge - We are family
• Xhibit - Multiply
• Gorillaz - Feel Good Inc.
• Anna Nalick - Breath
• Gretchen Wilson - All Jacked Up & Here For the Party
• DJ Jean vs ATB (Til I come) Launch Mix (AWESOME TECHNO!!!!!!!!!!!
• A ton of Disney music, cause Tawnia got me into it again. Go Heffalumps and Woozles!
• Paul McCartney - Fine Line (Excellent Song, and as always, Paul's musical abbility blows me away)

Next weeks downloads? Beetles stuff, Bob Dylan (that commercial for Kaiser reminded me I need to get his stuff!), and of course, more DJ Jean, since he totally rocks!

    Well this has been a huge update, and I've been trying to keep up with it, but you know.......oh well!!! I go back to my regular schedule starting tomorrow, (electronics)2-11, 2-11, (support) 1-10, 1-10, 1-10, off, off! YAY! I got into a fight with my assistant where he basically sat there and called me a liar. Needless to say, he's going down. I was upset for about 24 hours, and now I'm calmly planning his demise. I don't like being called a liar, and I work my butt off for that company. It's been interesting working with him though. For now, I pretend that he doesn't exist, and do what he wants when other associates are around (I am a paid member of the management team after all, can't have other associates thinking I don't support our team!). When it's just me, I laugh at him behind his back and think about dropping a pallet on him. *whistles happily while she goes to get laundry*

    Everyone have a great week, and please remember, it's Christmas, so when you walk into the store and see someone wearing antler ears with bells and tinsel on it, THAT'S ME!!! Merry Christmas Season everyone!!!!!

[Edit1:] Just rembered - Our next trip will actually be E3! That's right Suckas!!! Cry your hearts out! I'M GOING!!!

[Edit2:] Just remembered (x2), Star Wars 3 (or 6, depending on your counting), comes out today!!!! YAY!!! GO JEDI!